sunday evenings

like now,

is usually when the old familiar feeling of anxiety

strikes the hardest.

it creeps up on me,

at first from a distance,

then becomes bolder

as we approach the end

of the week

end.

Clearing

Do not try to save
the whole world
or do anything grandiose.
Instead, create
a clearing
in the dense forest
of your life
and wait there
patiently,
until the song
that is your life
falls into your own cupped hands
and you recognize and greet it.
Only then will you know
how to give yourself
to this world
so worth of rescue.

- Martha Postlewaite 

Duty

Obviously, I have no deliverable this Sunday. And because I did not plan, I had planned for failure. Were there too many projects to choose from? Was there — god forbid — a flinch?

So let's go back to structure. I'm remembering how I tackled each domain last time, with ideal scenarios, main objectives, and actionable items. I'm gonna bring back that format; an update on the direction I'm heading for each domain. I've again streamlined to 20 sub-domains (from the previous 22) pictured below.

Next Sunday's deliverable: Clear plans for 6 sub-domains of high priorities.

1. Sleep (Light)

2. Casesheets (Light)

3. Diet (Medium)

4. Exercise (Medium)

5. Sexualized Behaviours (Heavy)

6. Further Studies (Heavy)

I've also decided on my rewards for Beta Accountability: Film & TV!

For each line unbroken I get to download a new film, or tv series episodes! So each week means 5 potential downloads! But this only applies IF I deliver my Sunday deliverable.

So recently, instead of going on auto-pilot to download what I on-and-off crosses my mind, I've started making a list on a notepad file in my dropbox. The list presently includes Cardcaptor Sakura Season 3, Legend of Korra, Breakfast at Tiffany's, Marlon Brando films, James Dean films, & I'm pretty sure True Blood the upcoming season. 

I'm thinking this is quite a win-win situation. Instead of spending time to watch TV and avoiding the tasks, I delay my gratification by not even downloading it to begin with. I also employ the David Allen GTD method, of placing these possible films in a "Someday/Maybe" type of list so that it's not in my head, draining cognitive resources or occupying psychic space. But I also do really wanna watch them, so it motivates me to accomplish my daily tasks!

So I'm gonna try it out to see how motivating it really is.

Wish me luck!

Subject To Change

Re-e-value-ating; values & principles.

I.. forgot

People I met over the weekend and the things they said reminded me of things I should not have forgotten:

One: Be the change
Two: Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option

Quite awesome

昨日の自分より強く

Click for a bigger version

An updated version: reduced 13 sub-headings to 10. May the uncluttering and streamlining continue.
Persevere. Improve.

昨日の自分より強く　Stronger than you were yesterday.

Rock Lee, Naruto Shippuden Episode 28 

Fire Bird

Click for larger version

In an attempt to renew conviction, dedication, and motivation. An updated version of my previous wallpaper.